Ill

I have never really believe all these silly feng shui prediction sometimes, regarding health and the stars influencing it. Lately, I might just believe half of it. But the other half, I blame it on my workaholic idiosyncrasy.

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Why do I work so hard? hmm, question of the morning..

First answer that popped up: Company not paying enough

Secondly... escape from emptiness?

Thirdly,..guilt of doing nothing...

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Next question, if I have loads of $$$, what would I do..

First answer: Study

Second: Bring my parents to travel and have a good shopping trip!

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Well, to keep on count, I think I have visited the doctor at least once every month since last year 2009..

Oct: Flu
Nov: Flu
Dec: Flu
Jan: Leg doctor
Feb: I refused to see one, but still end up taking flu medication, Leg doctor
March: Throat doctor
April: still sick, but medicating at home
May: Eye specialist

My health is collapsing on me. My body is. I think if I don't do something about it soon. I might just slipped away soon with some disease.

My job is hazardous.

I still have a glimpse of hope that there will be increment end of this year. How could a company leader be so cruel? No incremement, no bonus..overtime increases and most unpaid? Yet, they are living in high rise luxuries, investing on new projects and not on staff that are worth keeping.....

They pay stupid expatriates and neglects local stuff. Forgive me, not all expatriates are lazy. But half of them are. Do they even spend their time working for events overtime. NO. Do they really care about the students. NOT FOR ALL. AND YET their salary is double ours and even more with all the plus plus allowance. WHY!? Are we worth so little locally? They may have knowledge to share with us which are good but sometimes not all of them understand our culture and how we work. Cultural difference, will become a gap if they do not understand it before they start to impart their knowledge to us.

Partially I blame the stupid parents and the asian mentality that an international school must have westerners to be well established and recognised.

Well, forgive me for what I said. I am just a resentful worker and i resent the wages difference. And let's not talk about wages difference, I think incremement every year even if it is just a little will make staff a lil happier. There is a motivation to work on at least. It is the students and wonderful colleagues that I have that kept the stupid me on the job still. No appraisal each year, so what am I working towards to improve? Am I progressing? And old staff have lower wages than new ones? WHAT THE HELL??! It is like the more experience u have the lower you are paid. All these boils down to NO INCREMENT that causes these off balance.

I have so much RAGE thinking of this. Wages low and yet they have so much unpaid overtime or it is paid like peanuts! It is taking up my leisure and part time job.

I am tired.

Angry.

Resentful.